Desire

Desire

7 Techniques to Figure Out What You Want

Nathanael Garrett Novosel, January 3 2024

There are many books on how to go after what you want in life. From specific step-by-step instructions in the how-to guides to more universal recommendations in philosophy, religious, and self-help texts, advice for how to get everything you want in life abound. However, texts on how to figure out what you want in life are less common. There are...

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Choice

What Underlies Bad Habits

Nathanael Garrett Novosel, November 8 2023

There are two famous books, The Power of Habit and Atomic Habits, that go into detail around how to break or change a habit. This won’t be a rehash of those books, though I do recommend reading them if you’re interested in how habits are formed and how they stick. All that is needed to know for this post is that a habit involves a trigger that...

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Desire

Finding What You Want through What You Don’t Want

Nathanael Garrett Novosel, November 1 2023

You know that one person who always drives you nuts: they say that they don’t care where they go out to dinner, and then when you suggest a series of several places, they nix every single one. Similarly, it’s a famous stereotype that women won’t order their own French fries but will immediately eat some off of someone else’s plate when his or her...

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Desire

Belief Is the Difference Between Excitement and Longing

Nathanael Garrett Novosel, October 4 2023

I’ve written a lot about my beef with The Four Noble Truths, which is famously translated into English to communicate that life is suffering and the cause of all suffering is desire. It goes on to explain that if you detach from that desire—and, ideally, from all desire—you will let go of that suffering and reach a state of peace. Now, apologists...

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Planning

Where Do You See Yourself in Five Years?

Nathanael Garrett Novosel, August 30 2023

In the immortal words of Creed Bratton of The Office, “If I can’t SCUBA, then what has this all been about? What am I working toward?” While this is quotation is meant to be funny since a man working an office job (with plenty of references to drugs, murder, and other seedy activities during the workday) for decades was all leading up to a...

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Emotions

Constructive vs. Unconstructive Caring

Nathanael Garrett Novosel, June 7 2023

I wrote in my previous post about how people focus more on screaming for others to change than thinking about things that they can do. There’s no doubt that most people care about issues—even though many are either pretending or grossly exaggerating their concern (The Office poked fun at this well when Ryan falsely professed his deep love for...

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Happiness

Desire and Anticipation Heighten Life Experience

Nathanael Garrett Novosel, February 8 2023

One of my favorite memories studying psychology is when I was told about an experiment where the experimenters told people to imagine they had won something (e.g., tickets to a concert, a kiss from their favorite celebrity) and then asked them when they would like to receive it. It's such a fascinating thought experiment because everyone thinks...

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Growth

When Growth Goes Wrong

Nathanael Garrett Novosel, December 21 2022

The Meaning of Life: A guide to finding your life's purpose goes into a lot of detail about how growth is the point because all life strives to be in a better state over time. It differentiates this purpose from happiness, which is the indicator of growth, such as when you feel happy after eating, sex, sleeping, or physical activity. One of the...

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Desire

Balancing Desire and Belief

Nathanael Garrett Novosel, November 23 2022

Most people know that you need to want something badly enough to drive forward and believe in yourself enough to continue through adversity. It is the main reason why people say, “Believe in yourself!” and, “It all comes down to who wants it more!” when trying to motivate people toward their goals. Many life philosophies, such as the Law of...

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Desire

Are You a Firefighter or a Dreamer?

Nathanael Garrett Novosel, September 21 2022

An exploration of your motivation As an Executive Advisor, I’ve helped business leaders for years present their strategies to other leaders and to their teams.  Their biggest issue was always around getting their audience to acknowledge and support the points they were making and the actions that they were proposing.  In presenting to these audienc...

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