Blaming others is the fastest, easiest way to avoid responsibility. We all know what it is like for someone to wrong us and for that person to be the reason why we are having a problem. And, if possible, we can try to respond, retaliate, or hold the person accountable. But, there's another side to this, which is what you do afterwards and whether...
Read MoreOne of my favorite memories studying psychology is when I was told about an experiment where the experimenters told people to imagine they had won something (e.g., tickets to a concert, a kiss from their favorite celebrity) and then asked them when they would like to receive it. It's such a fascinating thought experiment because everyone thinks...
Read MoreOne of the more (in)famous analogies from The Meaning of Life: A guide to finding your life's purpose is the relationship between happiness and growth being like the relationship between grades and learning. The reason for the analogy is that a large portion of the population is married to the idea that happiness is the meaning of life and so no...
Read MoreLife is all about growth, but we live in a world with a near-incalculable (i.e., how many bottom of the ocean?) number of organisms on it, all competing for growth-enabling resources. Trees compete for sunlight, animals compete over food and water, and some animals have to eat others to survive. Naturally, it would seem that the fight-for-your-li...
Read More“Happiness is a choice.” If you’ve ever listened to a self-help guru or optimistic person, you’ll have heard this statement. Many respond with, “Easy for you to say…you have ______. If I had that, I’d be happy, too,” or its opposite, “But you don’t have _______. If you had that, you wouldn’t be happy, either.” To many, happiness seems to be a matte...
Read MoreThere is one unifying goal in all of life: the positive outcome. Everyone is looking for that one meaning in life that makes them feel fulfilled: service to others, love, happiness, pleasure, achievement, learning, personal growth, financial success, respect, or appreciation. The truth is that it is all growth-related, as everyone looks forward t...
Read MoreYes, I know the title is a little too cute and seemingly paradoxical. But the truth is that happiness is a choice as much as it is a response to external stimuli. Give me a moment to explain how emotions work in humans vs. earlier organisms, and you’ll understand why the title is not a paradox nor a tautology but rather an explanation of—and a pr...
Read MoreBeing the most controversial assertion in The Meaning of Life: A guide to finding your life’s purpose, this blog post is probably long overdue. There is a long-standing belief that the meaning of life is to be happy, and much of positive psychology is focused on maximizing happiness as a result.
Read More"Money is the root of all evil." Yes, it's a cliché because people will do horrible things over money: lie, cheat, steal, fight, and even kill. It's also the source of much jealousy in this world: some people have it; some people don't; some people resent that others have more than they do (regardless of how much they have). But most anger, jeal...
Read MoreWhen you’re feeling cynical, miserable, or pessimistic, you are likely to say words to this effect: “Life sucks, and then you die.” What causes this? Well, all life situations are a result of nature and nurture: so some of your life outlook is built in your genetics, and some of it comes as a result of your life experiences.
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